“Do you care about your students?”

Guest post Chris Stuchko @chrisstuchko

I have been a teacher for 15 years. I have been in 100s of meetings over that time span. It probably is closer to 1,000 really. I have been asked many off-the-wall questions and have had conversations that only Special Education teachers, like myself, could appreciate. But never have I been so flustered by a question from a parent during a meeting.

“Do you care about your students?”

In the middle of a Zoom meeting that filled all the required Brady Bunch squares — a supervisor, an assistant principal, a school counselor, regular education teachers, special education teachers, a parent and a student — I stammered and was taken back by the question.

I repeated her query out loud, using a classic stall technique, while quickly trying to process if this was indeed a trick question.

Had I not done something to help this student? Did I misrepresent myself as I was speaking about the student and the start of the school year?

After several stammers and some real thought, I gave an “eloquent” answer.

“Of course I care about my students.”

What teacher doesn’t care about their students, I quickly rationalized.

There really can’t be any other answer, right? That has to be the automatic response. Like the answer that follows the question, “How do I look in this dress?”

As every single one of us in our profession today struggles with our teaching reality, hybrid reality, or virtual reality, I know the one common thread amongst educators everywhere is the high level of care we have for all of our students. We are all trying to do the best we can given what we are up against.

But after my amazing, ground-breaking answer, I quickly learned that the parent wasn’t negatively questioning my care for her student.

Rather, she was trying to make a point about the student’s ability to understand and evaluate if his teachers really cared about him. Her point in that question was to reinforce a simple, yet oft overlooked advice for life: people will do things for those that have their back.

My co-teacher and I in that particular class don’t have a magic formula for how to reach kids. If you really want a listicle that will give the 10 most groundbreaking, 100-percent guaranteed tips on how to show students you care, feel free to click off of this story and go somewhere else. But if you have chosen to keep reading, just know that anything you do to reach out to students can make an impact.

Remaining positive with a student who hears only negative can make an impact.

Noticing that a student drinks tea every day at 7:31 AM during class can make an impact.

Complimenting a student on a newly painted ceiling after seeing it day after day can make an impact.

Making silly jokes to a room of teenagers with their microphones dutifully silenced following virtual meeting etiquette can make an impact.

Letting everyone in a classroom, including yourself, know that it is OK to not be OK can make an impact.

After finishing with that meeting, and realizing that my co-teacher and I were doing our best to pass the care test with that particular student, I returned back to our virtual class session and made it a point to talk with everyone about that thought-provoking question

“Do you care about your students?”

It was the end of our sixth week with students. My co-teacher and I had only seen them in person one time for less than an hour before our school went virtual. We are scheduled to come back together in a few weeks, but like many things since March of last year, the only certainty is uncertainty.

We had to let them know and remind them that yes, we do care. We wanted them to know that even though all of us got to know each other as small boxes on a computer monitor for weeks, we are attempting to build relationships. We are all learning together how to show others we care when all we can do is show it through the computer.

It is a challenge and we are all struggling. But as educators, we know it is all about making those connections. That is what ultimately matters in the end.

When was the last time you thought about the teacher who taught the amazing lesson on parts of a plant? But the teacher who reached out to you in a time of need or saw something special in you? For many of us, the person who made the connection is the reason we are in this profession today.

“Do you care about your students?”

Now, more than ever, we need to show and reinforce the answer to that question with our students, and not just reflexively say “Of course!”

Originally published at http://rdene915.com on November 6, 2020.